Growing up is tough. You can find refuge here.

Posts tagged ‘Friendship’

Think about your future


It’s really hard sometimes to get past the things that have hurt us.  We tend to get so caught up in them that we can’t even see what is happening in the here and now; and what’s worse, we can’t find hope in the future.

So what do you want to do with your future?  What do you really want to do?  Go to college?  Study abroad?  Maybe you just want to set short term goals like making the volleyball team or getting on the honor roll.  It really doesn’t matter what your goals are, the important thing is to set them.  Keep pushing yourself forward.  Stay away from the people that drag you down, even if that means sticking with family for now.  God will send the right friends at the right time.

Don’t get so stuck on your past that you miss what’s happening around you.  Let it go.  Look ahead to all the exciting things you could do with your life.  I’ve said it before; there is a reason God didn’t put eyes in the back of our head.

Keep moving forward and look up as you go.Image

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Pray for your enemies? Really?


It’s one of the hardest things I have ever done; but I swallowed hard and just did it – I prayed for her.  She was causing a lot of stress in my life – and I had to deal with it daily.  There was no way to get away from it. So I prayed for her.  I asked God to bless her in her life; and I asked God to help me be Jesus to her.  I didn’t want to – I wanted to choke her actually. But we all know that would not be the best way to handle it – so I prayed.  And when I did – something really cool happened.  My heart changed.  I felt more compassion for her.  I felt more patient and merciful towards her.  God gave me the tools I needed to be the Godly woman He calls me to be.  He lifted the burden of handling this all on my own.

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Ashley with her dad getting ready for karate class.

My daughter, Ashley, was being bullied – pretty severely.  She was in the 6th grade.  There was this group of 3 or 4 girls that took every opportunity they could to call her names and corner her.  One time she was in the school bathroom – minding her own business. This group of girls came in and cornered her.  She could not get away.  They begun to push her and say hurtful things to her.  When she did manage to get away –  she was so upset that we wound up at the police department that evening.  Turns out if the girls would have moved her 5′ or more while she was cornered – we could have charged them for kidnapping.  That didn’t happen of course – but it had to stop nonetheless.  So we filed our report and went home.

That evening as I was tucking my daughter into bed – we started talking about prayer.  I asked her if she had ever prayed for these girls.  One of them in particular (we will call her Kathy) was the instigator.  If she wasn’t at school – the bullying didn’t happen. So I asked her; “Ashley – have you ever thought about praying for Kathy?  You should have seen the look she gave me.  It was as if I had asked her if I had 5 eyes. I explained to her that Jesus tells us to pray for our enemies. (Matthew 5:44)  It was a hard concept for her to grasp;  And understandably so….so I prayed with her.  We prayed for Kathy.  We prayed for her almost every night for several months.

The school year came to an end and summer was here. She didn’t have any run ins with Kathy and her gang thankfully.

When the school year started back up – Ashley decided to join cross country.  Guess who else was on the team.  Yep – Kathy was on her team.  We encouraged Ashley to stick with it and we made sure we kept an eye on the situation.  Then something really cool happened.  Ashley and Kathy began to talk.  They began to run together.  They got to really know each other   Before we knew it – Ashley was asking if she could invite Kathy over to stay the night.  While her dad and I were apprehensive, we consented. We were pleasantly surprised.  Kathy turned out to be a fun girl and we enjoyed having her around.

Ashley and Kathy remain friends.  They have different goals in life and do not hang out anymore. But when they pass in the hall – Ashley gets a high five instead of a low blow.

Mercy. Love. Grace. Forgiveness. Friendship. A Life Lesson.  All of these and more were gained by following one simple teaching in the bible. Imagine what we could accomplish if we followed all  of them.